My mind is my biggest enemy


We all know I am a worrier.  I can’t help it, and my mind just seems to hold on to things and won’t let them go.  Am I really worry about something that I need to be worried about or have I just made it up in my head? These thoughts eventually become so big that I feel like I am tripping over them all the time.  I hate being like this.  My counselor once told me that when I was growing up I had to be very tuned into people around me so to make sure I didn’t upset the apple cart I learned to adapt to other people to keep peace.  So, I try to do better about this.  I try to do daily meditations, prayer, and repeat affirmations.  Most of the time this helps.  Sometimes it doesn’t.  There are things that come up and I am quickly able to let them go, but sometimes things come up and when it involves people I truly care about, I worry.  Have I done all I could to help the issue?  Have I done something to offend?  Should I call the person and try to resolve it?  Will that make it worse?  It usually does.

Today was one of those days when nothing helped.  I called my sister and voiced some concerns that I have and she very calmly encouraged me to not think about them, don’t worry about this or that, and after our conversation I did feel better.  I am always thankful for my sister and her professionalism when it comes to resolving things.  I find that we are all insecure at times, but truly we are only responsible for ourselves.  I can only fix myself.  I can’t be responsible for how everyone feels and I can’t fix everyone’s problems.



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